one decade ago

“Old times never come back and I suppose it’s just as well.  What comes back is a new morning every day in the year, and that’s better.” - George E. Woodberry

 I miss old times.  The times when I simply hang out and read a book or listen to music I’ve never heard before.  I miss those times when I play the guitar or go to the gym or simply just stare at my white ceiling.  I miss doing nothing; I miss listening to the wind and doing nothing.

The last time I read a new book was during the Christmas vacation.  I opened new books but I can never finish it.  I can’t discover new music anymore.

And yet, I continuously say to everyone and to myself, I am enjoying everyday of my life.  I enjoy my position, my senior year status and everything else that goes with it, even if I don’t get to do things I privately enjoy.  All the new things I enjoy involve other people and I don’t have time for myself.

I sleep at 12mn and wake up at 7am.  The routine is sickening.

And yet, time goes by so fast and it is quite sad.

I haven’t had one whole weekend without going to school.  I miss my Saturday afternoons where I spend my time doing things I love doing. I miss last year’s routine.

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My favorite book was made into a movie and it’s showing in theatres now.  I don’t know if I want to watch it.  The movie might destroy the essence of the book.  Another beloved book will be coming out in theatres very very soon.  Why is Hollywood destroying my books?

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I miss Hey Arnold, Kenan and Kel, Dexter’s Laboratory, Clarissa, Arthur.  I miss casette tapes, senti music and the old VHS rental place at the corner.

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“We can do some wrecking here, and find something to love in this broken place, in this broken place.” - “Wrecking” by Laura Veirs

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I feel sad.