yet to know image

There was a time that I was obsessed with Harry Potter and because of it, I read fanfiction.  Don’t worry, I used to read those clean ones, not the ones that made no sense and sincerely had a desire to match two people for that. So anyway, I was always fond of  fanfictions that depict a Hermione and Draco pairing.  I don’t know why, but it was an obsession as well.  Maybe it was due to the fact that it will never happen.  Or due to the fact that not once was it mentioned in the book that either of them looked good.  Or maybe due to the fact that I somewhat like “bad boys” who are not really bad once you talk to them and that they’ll protect you from all the other scumbags of the world.

That was 4 years ago, however, these days, I started reading this Hermione/Draco fanfiction again.  I don’t know why, again.  It just occured to me to just do so.   And then suddenly I feel myself beginning to be solemn and quite around people, well, these days.  Maybe it was just PMS or something, I don’t know. But when I am alone, I feel rather sad.  It was the effect of these fanfiction, I’m certain of it.

Earlier I was driving to school, it was so gloomy, my radio was playing sad songs and I couldn’t concentrate on the road.  All I could think about is how would it feel to be loved, well, I know how, but what I wanted to know how is to be loved like that.   Again, I’m blabbing about this issue, like I’ve blabbed before over and over again.  And in some retrospect, I want my love to be somewhat (take note of the word) forbidden.  Well, because of the fact that it’s forbidden and you still love each other makes it more dramatic in a sense because you are breaking rules.  And please don’t have a dirty mind when I say forbidden.

Damn it, I need a boyfriend.