cascading thoughts

I faced humiliation and utter embarassment to be a "tour guide" which would cause me fatigue and exhaustion, I passed.  What would it benefit me?  Nothing, perhaps a nice little spot in my collection of extra-curricular activities for the transcript.

My highschool friend whom I haven’t seen for two years went home to visit.  She had been living and studying in the US for college.  I’m just excited to get a chance to catch up with her.  It’s been a long time.  I bet nothing has changed between us, she was a friend, i could count my friends.  We’ll meet up for sure, but I don’t know for my highschool class though.  We haven’t seen each other as a whole really, a reunion.  Our president wasn’t really that good,  she should have made a directory for us and a yahoo groups, which didn’t occur, how are we going to keep in touch?

******

Rock and Alternative had always been my true love in terms of music.  Anything under rock and alternative is great.  Not all songs are good though, there are those that just suck to the deepest of its core you don’t even know how it had come to existence. 

You know what I really love though?  The songs which start out very quiet, almost whispering where the lyrics just tremble.  The song slowly builds up until it reaches a boom where a strong guitar solo riff would occur then silence again.  The silence would be interrupted causing strong riffs and drums and would be stopped by the entrance of a violin solo.  The vocals come alive again while the violin continues, then all the other instrument will bang once more until the end of the song which would end with the violin still swaying dramatically.  That must be the key word drama.  I just adore guitar and violin solos.  It’s like a bad boy meeting a demure girl.  The only song that comes to my mind with this is Gifts and Curses by Yellowcard but I’m sure there are better songs with this type of arrangement.  Nevertheless, Gifts and Curses is a really good song.

within 5 months

One year ago, if you told me that I would have a desire to wear silly costumes, will act like a cockroach and recite my favorite song in front of inanimate objects while practicing different emotions, I wouldn’t have believed you, but they happened, just very recently.  I decided to tackle another imposing challenge.  I tried out for this sort-of tour guide for our school and it isn’t just a sign-up, it was really a try out with lots of processes.  Surely, these are the things I wouldn’t have done in highschool even if I was forced to do so.  These are things that are way out of my ordinary routine that people would wonder what happened to me in the middle of it all.  This year is incredibly exciting and different for me, therefore, I’m going to list what have happened to me in a span of 5 months.  What I would write below will bestow either of two emotions from you dear reader, my arrogance or my being a simpleton.  Either way, some are things I never thought I would be doing in my life but did nonetheless because I always felt that I could achieve more than expected.  Just so, these are things that I’ve never done before this year and they sure say something about my growing up.  These are things that make me feel special in my own way, at least even in my eyes. 

1)  Ran for candidacy….and won. - My first time ever to run for anything, therefore, my first time ever to even become an officer for something.

2)  Saw the Maroon 5 concert. - This doesn’t say much, but 3 years ago, when we were in the States, it sucked that I missed the opportunity of watching them, I never thought that it would still happen.

3)  Presented a play presentation entirely in French. - My new found language.

4)  Went white water rafting. - Probably one of the coolest thing I’ve did so far.

5)  Rode a zip-line. - I was hanging and falling while attached to a mere .50 inch thick of a wire.

6)  Taking minors. - When I went to college, I thought I would just graduate with a degree, I didn’t think that I would graduate with two minors.

7) Tried out for TnT. - It would be hard to relate to what a TnT is, but they sure are a bunch of overenthusiastically high people who would make touring a lot more fun.

8)  Invested in stocks. - I’m damn poor right now after risking my entire life savings.  I’m not even eating during lunch hours, but this is how some people got rich, by investing instead of just hiding cash away.  I might become the next millionaire at 21.  

Yeah, as I said, either arrogance or naiveness. No matter, these are things that I wouldn’t have done if I remained in my highschool mind and had no dreams or aspirations, just wanting to graduate.  I’m so glad I changed.  I speak to people now, I’m slightly well-known and not afraid to expand my existing horizon.  I sure hope that I continue on what I’m doing. 

a secret affair

I’m going to share another song.  This isn’t my current mood or something related to me, it’s just nice, rather, it’s sad

Tell Him - Benton Fall 

If you wait
by the side of the road
Then I will pick you up
if you stay
and wait for me
I will be there in my baby blue Ford
I will be there from two in the morn
But don’t tell your dad
Because I don’t have a tale to tell
Tell him something else

Tell him you’re away
Tell him anything
Tell him you’re at Julie’s
Tell him you’re away
Tell him anything
Tell him you’re at Julie’s

So give him the number
To call if he’s scared
To call if he cares
Give him the number
To call if he’s scared
To call if he cares

If you wait
By the side of the road
Then you will be disappointed
If you stay and wait for me
In my Baby Blue ford
I ain’t coming ’round here no more
So Go tell your dad
Because I never had a tale to tell you
Go Tell Him we are through…

*******

After the third stanza of the song, there is an instrumental bridge signaling the shift of mood, we don’t exactly know why or what happened, but it’s something bad as reflected in the last stanza.  At first, they were so in loved with each other as presented by the girl’s probable secret of meeting up with this boy.  She is hiding their affair from her father so here comes the boy suggesting things for her.  Then there was this shift, the bridge, that changed everything.  The last stanza is the mirror of the first stanza with changes that reflect their breaking-up. It is actually very sad.  The music of the song is even sad.  It’s one of those "emo" songs that they love to talk about and pretend to understand.

We know the beginning, we know the ending, what we don’t know is the climax; interesting.