i woke up and became human

Do we actually need a wake up call?  Well I thought I couldn't handle it at that moment.

I struggled throughout my first year in college knowing that I was in the waiting-list before I was accepted.  My first year wasn't very hard actually, it was high school, easy.  But I was stuck with the idea that I was merely in the waiting-list of my dream school and it tore me.  I got in the school anyway because of a bunch of appeals I had to make and even though, I felt dismayed.  My family and highschool friends said that I actually pass but did not get in the quota to make me feel better, but I wanted to feel great.  So I did struggled.  I almost failed my first semester and I thought that I would be dropped out when I finished my second semester because my QPI might have not been reached, you can just image how surprised I was when I saw a big boost in the grade.  I had summer classes after the first year and when that ended, I was very stricken that my grades where very high at the end, the types of grades that were impossible for me in highschool.

Today,  I am celebratring my first day of my semestral break, the longest break available in my school.  During my first semester for the second year, I was doing great.  Everything was in order for making the grade this year for me to become in the Dean's List, I was very excited.  This semester was very very difficult as well for me but I was handling it my way and things were interesting anyway so I am able to do it. You would think then that I was finally on top of my game but then I was struck with a flu at the very VERY last week of the semester, the final's week.  I couldn't study because when I am at home, all I can do is lie down and sleep.  When I was taking the test, I couldn't even read and comprehend all the black marks they call letters.  In short, one and a half year of this stress without much of a break was difficult.  I felt alright and was doing great but my last week was inevitable.  I guess my dreams would fail this time.

That is when I woke up.  I haven't been sick for a long time.  I haven't been that sick where all I could do was sleep for a long time.  And here I am thinking that sickness doesn't exist in my system.  Why did it happen at the most important week of the semester? 

I still actually don't know the morale of all this.  Is there any?  You work very hard for something and then when its presentation time, you get hit.   Did God think it was funny?  Would He laugh or was he trying to teach me something that I am yet to figure out?  I don't blame Him though.  I might have been a little "workaholic" for school and didn't bother much with anything.  But that is what the sembreak is for right?  So I still don't get it.  I am not superwoman, I am only a woman.  And maybe, even if I'm not meant to become a DL in school until I graduate, maybe, something else is more important for me.